With Valentine’s Day in this year’s rearview mirror, love is still in the air! And, it can be the right time to move in together with your lover. Or at least to think about it? But are you both ready? What about the kids or the pets? Well, we have the answers for you about moving in together.
Moving in together is a big step in any relationship, as you know. It is more than just moving to a place to be theirs, or them moving into yours, or finding a new home. It is living together. The moving-in part is easy; it is after the fact that challenges can arise.
The way to know if you are ready for this new chapter in your relationship is by taking notes of certain aspects. Such as:
Another important aspect is finance. Moving in together and living with a partner can offer a lot more gray areas when it comes to financing when compared to living with a roommate. The latter, both of you know who pays what amount and when. The former is slightly more complex. However, if you and your partner sit down and one of the things to talk about before moving in together is finance, then this is the right thing to do.
A couple should have a clear conversation about the subject matter in great detail then you both are on your way to co-partner-living. But, this has to be an ongoing conversation since life has a habit of throwing lemons a couple ways.
We have listed the reasons you should move in together. However, not every relationship is ready for this next step. Some friendships are not even ready for this step. Moving in together should be a step to becoming more committed to each other while also having independence. If you and your partner are planning on taking this step due to reasons outside of this one, maybe you should reconsider living together.
Couples moving in together to combat a problem in their relationship such as wanting to spend more time with each other, saving money, sorting out trust issues, etc. can lead to more problems down the line. Moving in together is a short-term solution to the above-mentioned issues that are in relationships before the door is even locked.
These issues will not go away if you are in each other’s space. For example, trust issues can be heightened while living together. These need to be talked about before the thought of moving even happens. It may be exciting to live together in the beginning, but this wears down quickly, and the issues will still be there.
Therefore, questions to ask before moving in together are you both ready? And why do you want to live together in the first place? If the answer is for fun, and to deepen the connection, then you both are more likely good to move.
Now comes the main questions: how long should you wait before moving in together? While this can depend on the status of the relationship the average time before moving in together is usually about half a year. This is because there is such a thing as the “honeymoon period” where everything is honey without the angry bees. The start of a relationship is usually where people ignore or do not notice flaws in their partners.
It can only be after this period that the relationship cools down (in the best way) and the facade of courting comes to an end. It is here that you both can see each other for all that you are flaws and all. This period of waiting is important since there can be a lot of relationship problems after moving in together certainly if you both are moving in together too soon.
Remember you are not only moving, but living with another person. Think of yourself, and all the things you do behind closed doors alone. Your partner does the same. If you know this, and they know this as well as can handle it then maybe it would be the right time to make a move. Best not to rush.
Relationships come in all shapes. Some couples may even have kids in the mix. If you are in a relationship and kids are in the game, then you both also have to talk about moving in together with kids. To each other, and to them as well as about the topic of moving.
Kids, depending on their ages, like predictability. Moving and living together is a huge change for everyone involved. Therefore, make sure that you prepare them for this change. Sit them down with your partner and hear what they have to say. Also, let them be a part of the process. As in what they want to take with them or what color they want their walls to be, etc.
Take it slow when kids are in the picture. This means allowing everyone to spend time together before the move as a way to get used to each other. Maybe even like the idea of living together under one roof. Keep the kids in the front view window, and do not discount their views or worries. Moving is big, but a lot bigger when you are small.
However, it is best to make sure that the relationship is strong, as well as being for the long-haul. If the relationship is new, maybe do not introduce your lover to the kids within the first few days or weeks. They can know that you are dating, but keep off the introduction until the relationship is ready for them, and them for the relationship. The last thing you would want is to introduce someone who will “leave” soon after due to a breakup.
Another important aspect of this topic is making sure you and the partner are on the same page. This means figuring out how the new home will run. When is bedtime? When is it a fun time? What are the house rules? How to handle conflicts between the kids, you and your partner, etc. This part can make or break a welcoming new home for the kids.
Moving in together with pets is a different ball game, certainly so if you both have pets. You may know your fluffy friend extremely well, but you will never know how they will react to another pet. Therefore, you would have to introduce your pet to not only your partner but to their pets too. The scent is the focus before the meeting can even take place.
You can do this by borrowing your partner’s pet’s toy or bedding. Or by swapping them with your pet’s ones. This is sothey can meet the other fluff ball before they even see each other. Furthermore, you can reward positive interactions with the items in the form of treats. However, it is best to give the beddings or toys a good wash before you give them back. While your pet is getting used to the new scent, they are putting their own on it at the same time. Or they could have peed on it.
When it comes to moving in with dogs first meeting you both would want to opt for a park. Decide on a day and time, as well as to make sure both parties are on leashes. It is just in case you have to take control of the situation. There are also signs you should look out for such as tail and ears up mean that the dog is chilled with the encounter. However, if their tail and ears are down it means they are afraid. And, if they growl, best to make them back off each other.
Work slowly towards them getting used to each other. Depending on the dogs some may click straight away while others can take a while. If it is the latter then you may want to get an experienced dog handler, or walker to manage the meetings.
Cats are another story. They can meet indoors for one. And, the other is to let them get to know each other slowly. They must be aware of the other’s presence. It can be a gradual, elongated meeting. However, if a dog or a cat is way too aggressive, you would have to step in. Speak to a vet or a professional on how to help them get along while living together. Living together can be challenging, even for pets. The last thing any living creature wants is more stress, as well as anxiety.
If you two decide that it is the right time, and you have prepped everyone involved from each other, kids, and pets, then one of the first items on your moving in together checklist should be contacting Shyft.
Shyft is a fintech company that works as your personal moving organization who will do the whole organization of getting you together into your new home. The first step is to contact Shyft and this is easily done. You just go to their site, fill out their form, and that is that.
From there a Move Coach will contact you at a time that fits nicely into your schedule. They will call you when you say they will call you, not before, and not after. This first call is a video chat through their free downloadable app known as ShyftNext app.
It is through the app and during the call that your Move Coach can take down and create your inventory list. This list is then passed on to you within half an hour after the ending of the call. This is so you can both check everything and make sure each other’s important items are on the list. When your Move Coach knows that the list is good to do, they go to Shyft’s secure bidding platform.
It is here that the details of your move are presented to a big group of experienced moving companies. They bid on your move, and Shyft picks three or move quotes to send to you. You pick the best mover to take on your gig. And, if you have any questions, you can contact Shyft and your Move Coach at any time of the day, night, even over the weekend. As in, truly, 24 hours, 7 days a week.
Furthermore, if you both are thinking of buying new items for the new home you can check out Shyft’s marketplace. Here is where you can find a lot from furniture to insurance, mortgages, and even a dog-walker. The best part is that every item comes with discounts. What is even better is that the items are delivered directly to your new home’s doorstep.
Shyft really does add love to the move so that you both do not have to worry about it. Start your new romantic chapter with the help of Shyft, and feel the love from their end too.